Posts tagged anxious
Can you hold two things at once?
Can you hold two things at once?

The Pay What You Please Online Course Sale is happening NOW through Sunday, April 24!

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Elizabeth Gilletteanxious attachment, anxious avoidant trap, anxious-avoidant, anxious, anxious-ambivalent, anxious avoidant dynamic, attachment styles, avoidant partner, avoidant attachment style, avoidant, anxious-avoidant relationship pattern, avoidant attachment, attachment style, attachment theory, attachment, anxious attachment style, secure attachment style, secure attachment, secure attachment relationship, Cultivating Secure Attachment Comment
Are you projecting your old wounding on to new people?
Are you projecting your old wounding on to new people?

I’ve been thinking a lot about how our old relationship patterns show up over and over again in our lives, and how we have opportunity after opportunity to heal those patterns with new people. I see it every day in myself and the people around me (and once you see it, you can’t unsee, so get ready!).

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Elizabeth Gilletteanxious attachment, attachment styles, anxious, anxious-ambivalent, fearful avoidant, secure, secure attachment style, secure attachment, insecure attachment Comment
What you don’t heal follows you
What you don’t heal follows you

I hope you are doing well and February is feeling more ease-full than January (I’m not sure what your January was like, but mine was LONG).

Like many of us, I’ve been hard at work in my own personal therapy on processing some of the difficult experiences I’ve gone through and growing my awareness of the old patterns I carry with me, many of which I don’t even realize are still hanging around. And just like my clients, I have had several moments where I’ve said out loud “I honestly thought I worked through that already! Why is it coming up for me again?” My answer to myself recently has been this: healing has many layers.

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Elizabeth Gilletteavoidant attachment triggers, anxious attachment, attachment styles, anxious avoidant trap, anxious, anxious-avoidant, anxious-ambivalent, attachment style, attachment theory, avoidant attachment, attachment, disorganized attachment, avoidant dismissive Comments
This Attachment Statistic Blew My Mind
This Attachment Statistic Blew My Mind

I read an article recently that shared this statistic that I hadn’t heard before in my attachment theory studies:

“Further research tells us that in approximately 85 percent of cases a child…will have the same attachment pattern as the parent” (Buckwalter and Ehmen, 2013).

It makes sense that children will have a similar attachment style to their caregiver in a number of cases—but 85% of the time?!

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Elizabeth Gilletteattachment styles, attachment theory, attachment style, secure attachment style, secure attachment, anxious, anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, avoidant Comments
How Not to Lose Yourself in a Relationship
How Not to Lose Yourself in a Relationship

I used to be a person who would lose herself in romantic partnerships. And to be honest, over the past 14 months of being a mother and experiencing a global pandemic, I’ve felt whispers of those times in my life. Who am I anymore? What do I like? What is it like to maintain some of my energy for myself rather than constantly investing it in others?

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Elizabeth Gilletteanxious, anxious-ambivalent, anxious attachment, anxious partner, anxious attachment style, secure attachment, secure attachment relationship Comment
When You Are Triggered in Your Relationship
When You Are Triggered in Your Relationship

Hello!

We've talked over the past several weeks about the importance of understanding attachment, how to learn our attachment styles, and some strategies for identifying our needs and our partner's needs when we are feeling disconnected. That's a lot of information! Thank you for being here and exploring this with me.

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Elizabeth Gillettepartnership, partnerships, relationships, trigger, triggered, soothing strategies, connection, anxious, anxious-ambivalent, avoidant, avoidant dismissive, attachment, attachment style, attachment theory, here to heal podcast, heirloom counseling Comments