How to Apologize When You Haven't Done Anything Wrong

Have you ever been in a relationship where your partner let you know they wouldn’t be able to move on until you apologize to them? And you’re wondering why you should have to apologize when you don’t even know what you’re arguing about (and you clearly didn’t do anything wrong and they should get over it)?

Yep. It’s definitely a thing.

Elizabeth GilletteJanuary 20, 2019healthy relationships, relationship anxiety, relationship counseling, marriage counseling, apologizing, saying sorry, attachment, attachment theory, avoidant attachment, anxious attachment, anxious avoidant trap Comments

What are you healing in your family?

When I created Heirloom Counseling, my intention was to bring focus to the fact that our relational patterns are passed down from generation to generation. This means we have the opportunity to heal our entire family line when we show up to do the work in the present moment. This realization is incredibly powerful if we believe we have the tools to engage in relationships with integrity and awareness. If not, this task can feel overwhelming and pressured.

Elizabeth GilletteDecember 17, 2018attachment theory, attachment style, anxious avoidant dynamic, anxious-ambivalent, anxious attachment, healthy relationships, relationship anxiety, relationship counseling, healing, intergenerational healing Comment

The Enneagram as a Relationship Tool with Monica Leblanc, LPC, LCAS

I am so excited to share the work of my dear friend and colleague, Monica Leblanc. She is a skilled therapist and practitioner who incorporates the use of the Enneagram in her work with clients (and her relationships with friends!). Do you know about the Enneagram as a tool for individual and relationship growth? If not, read on—it’s pretty amazing. I have personally used the Enneagram in my relationship with partner with incredible results. We learned so much about each other (and made sense of what we already knew) when we began to incorporate the wisdom of the Enneagram and use it as a tool to support our interactions and communication.

Elizabeth GilletteDecember 10, 2018relationship anxiety, relationship counseling, healthy relationships, enneagram, anxious-avoidant, anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, avoidant partner Comment

Healing the Anxious-Avoidant Relationship Dynamic: Part 2

One of the first blog posts I wrote about attachment in relationships has turned out to be my most-read post to date, and for good reason: the anxious-avoidant relationship dynamic can be REALLY HARD. I totally get it. If you have experienced it before, you know exactly what I’m talking about. All it takes is a snag in an interaction to trigger the negative cycle and before you know it, one person is pulling away and “going out for a while” and the other person is crying and angry and wondering how they ended up in a partnership with someone who doesn’t talk about feelings—ever.

Elizabeth GilletteDecember 3, 2018anxious avoidant trap, anxious avoidant dynamic, anxious attachment, avoidant partner, attachment theory, attachment style, relationship counseling, relationship anxiety, secure attachment Comments

Your Phone Might Be Ruining Your Attachment Relationships

If there is one thing I could suggest to couples who are experiencing disconnection in their relationships, it’s this:

Put you phones down and look at each other.

Elizabeth GilletteOctober 22, 2018anxious attachment style, avoidant attachment style, effective communication, attachment theory, counseling, heirloom counseling, relationship counseling, therapy, marriage counseling, avoidant partner Comment

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